The Thanksgiving Post

Thanksgiving is my very favourite day of the entire year. I love that it’s a day dedicated to gratitude.

Yes, it’s a difficult year. This has been a hard several weeks (it’s honestly only been a little over 3 weeks since the world changed, seems longer.)

But that is no reason to avoid gratitude.

When I got sick a few years ago, my first oncologist told me to get my affairs in order as soon as possible. One of the things I did was to write an Ethical Will. It includes the wisdom I wish to pass down to my friends and family, and one of those things is “gratitude”.

Not everyone finds it easy to be grateful. They focus on things they don’t have, but want. They think about things that are wrong in their lives. As usual, I take a different approach.

Every morning when I wake up, I stretch out, and then think how happy I am that I got to sleep in a bed, with my pillow and blankie, indoors. When I stand up, I am glad that I am able to stand up, and that I didn’t make it into the obituaries that day. Then I revel in the fact that I have potable water, indoor plumbing, electricity, and coffee ready to be prepared. And yes, I am completely cognizant of how much privilege this is.

If you’ve never done this, please try it. A minute of gratitude as you greet the day. See if it doesn’t improve your outlook and set your day up for success. Seriously, try it. What do you have to lose?

A week before Thanksgiving, I make a list, and use it to send thank you notes to people who made my life better over that past year.

Today, I will go downstairs in my favourite pajamas and be surrounded by my two dogs. (Another reason to be grateful.) We’ll go outside for our morning constitutional¹. Then the breakfast ordeal. My older dog, Fiona, who will be 14 in February, has an inoperable tumor, and neither wants to eat nor take her medicine. She only takes her meds when it is mixed into warm human food, and then hand/spoon fed to her. Since she’s short, and will not sit at the table², this means 10 - 15 minutes of sitting cross-legged on the floor. I am grateful when I can get her to eat all (or at least mostly all) of it. I am grateful for every day that I have with this incredible being: even though she can no longer run like the wind (she once almost caught a deer), she retains her yielding personality, her love of all people, and her uncanny ability to get people who are afraid of dogs to lay down with her, in the aura of her love for the world.

When I stand up, I am grateful that I have a great orthopedist who will replace my left knee whenever I find the time. (He’s been pushing for this for almost 10 years, but I’m busy.)

Then, I will prep my stuffing. While, as my husband says, there is nothing exotic in it, and I could make it any day of the year, I ONLY make it on Thanksgiving, and it’s a special treat, for which I am grateful.

Later today, I will call people to tell them I love them, and I’m grateful to have them in my life. I will make extra loving gestures to my husband, who took care of me when I was too sick to take care of myself, and who suffers because of all I do related to politics³.

I will peruse the Black Friday ads. I have a whole Black Friday process, but can’t go to the stores when they are packed with people until I get my immune system back. But there’s always online! In a normal year, I would have a map, with lists of items to buy, and a schedule. I am grateful that I have enough money to buy things for the toy drives, and for people in need. Most of the people I know need nothing - they live indoors.

Unlike many people, I find glee in very simple things. This used to make my mother nuts. She called it “idiot’s delight”. She never understood how something really simple could cause me to celebrate. For example, I was at an ice cream parlor with my parents, and the counter girl asked if wanted sprinkles on my cone, and I, OF COURSE, said, “Yes, absolutely, thank you.” And then, the unexpected: she asked if I wanted chocolate or multi-colored sprinkles. I had known there were the two kinds, but I’d never been anywhere with both! I was perplexed and unsure, and she asked if I’d like half and half. That’s what I received, and it was the best ice cream cone of my life because it had TWO kinds of sprinkles on it. I was sure I was the most special person in the world. HOW LUCKY!!!⁴

So, PLEASE, take today and find ways to be grateful for what you have, and for those you love. Make sure they know you love them, and are grateful to have them in your life. Find joy in simple things. Anything else can wait until tomorrow.

For me, things are waiting until Monday, as I am taking the whole weekend off. If you miss me, check out the archives here, for earlier posts you might have missed.

With peace and love to all of you…

1. I have been lectured to about why it is incredibly unacceptable to be outside in pajamas. Hold your breath, I walk the dogs at 5:30 a.m. and all the other people out at that hour are actually in their pajamas, except one neighbor who goes to work early, and she’s seen all my pajamas.

2. Olivia, my dog before Fiona, WOULD sit at her assigned seat at the table, and eat from her bowl. She also had her own computer, and worked with Alzheimer’s patients, but those are stories for another day. I am grateful for the 15 1/2 years I had with Olivia.

3. It’s truly a time suck, which I am passionate about, but it does cut time from “couple time”, and he’s resigned to it. It also takes time from other things, which is why we have a sign that reads: “I cannot clean the house and save the world at the same time.”

4. In the interest of full disclosure, I was in my early 40’s when this incredible occassion occured. I’ve never had the opportunity again, but maybe someday…